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| 12:01pm 11/06/2006 |
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mood:  sad
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On his side of the bed, he's sleeping like a baby
Dreams are dancin' in his head lying with his lady
It's a peaceful night, and everything's just fine on his side of the bed
But on her side of the bed, those big brown eyes are cryin' from the things he never says
And deep inside she's dying
As she turns to face the wall, there's no love at all
On her side of the bed
If he'd just reach out she'd forget about all the times that he let her down
Oh but in his mind everything's all right when the lights go out
On his side of the bed he never even noticed her negligee of red
The very same one that she wore the night that they were wed
But he never turned his head to her side of the bed
Now on his side of te bed he wakes up and turns to say, "I love you"
But instead all he finds are pages full of words she'd never said
And that's all she left
On her side of the bed |
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| 06:30pm 04/06/2006 |
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mood:  blah
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Jessie graduated today.
And I'm having a really hard time with it and no one understands. I guess it is more about the fact that she is leaving and I am not. I want her to stay with me but at the same time I know she will be better at NYU doing what she wants....instead of misable at Tufts because we all want her there.
I know eventually I will go out and do great things but sitting there, watching all the graduates and hearing about the places they'll be...I was so sad. I want to be doing all those things.
But usually I don't think like that. Usually I am so happy to still be here and surrounded by family and people who need me. I know that my church is in a place of change and I have been called to help it through. What more honor could I ask for? And all the plays and concerts and just things that I would have missed if I had left. Sooooo many things. And you should see Colton when I walk in the door. He is such a sweetheart. I don't think anyone is sweeter than him. And I can finally appreciate my parents as the people they are. I enjoy spending time with them. And Jay, there is everything and nothing to say about Jay.
So for me, I know this is right.
But sometimes I just wish I could see what it would have been like.
Well, its not like I'll never see Jessie again....but she is my best friend and I don't know what I am going to do without her here. |
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| 10:03am 25/02/2006 |
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so 2006 so far has totally sucked, huh guys? |
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| 04:52pm 23/02/2006 |
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all i have to say is that if i don't start making friends soon its going to be a long four years... |
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| 12:04pm 14/11/2004 |
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Fathers be good to your daughters
Daughters will love like you do
Girls become lovers who turn into mothers
So mothers be good to your daughters, too |
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| 03:37pm 22/08/2004 |
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i guess thats it
and you dont even care |
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| 02:25pm 20/08/2004 |
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Early each day to the steps of Saint Paul's
The little old bird woman comes.
In her own special way to the people she calls,
"Come, buy my bags full of crumbs.
Come feed the little birds, show them you care
And you'll be glad if you do.
Their young ones are hungry,
Their nests are so bare;
All it takes is tuppence from you."
Feed the birds, tuppence a bag,
Tuppence, tuppence, tuppence a bag.
"Feed the birds," that's what she cries,
While overhead, her birds fill the skies.
All around the cathedral the saints and apostles
Look down as she sells her wares.
Although you can't see it, you know they are smiling
Each time someone shows that he cares.
Though her words are simple and few,
Listen, listen, she's calling to you:
"Feed the birds, tuppence a bag,
Tuppence, tuppence, tuppence a bag." |
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| 03:48pm 04/08/2004 |
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the rumors flew
but nobody knew how much she blamed herself
for years and years
she tried to hide the whiskey on her breath
she finally drank her pain away a little at a time
but she never could get drunk enough to get him off her mind until that night
she out that bottle to her head and pulled the trigger
and finally drank away his memory
life is short but this time it was bigger
than the strength she had to get up off her knees
they found with her face down in the pillow
clinging to his picture for dear life
they laid her next to him beneath the willow
while the angels sang a whiskey lullaby |
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| for the record... |
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| 02:00pm 29/07/2004 |
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mood:  weird
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"Obie Trice/Name No Gimmicks..."
Refrain 1
2 trailer park girls go round the outside/ round the outside, round the outside (Repeat Refrain 1)
Refrain 2
Guess whos back, back again/ Shadys back, tell a friend/ Guess who's back, guess who's back, gruess who's back/ Guess who's back...
Verse 1
I've created a monster, cuz nobody wants to/ see Marshall no more they want Shady I'm chopped liver/ well if you want Shady, this is what I'll give ya/ a little bit of me mixed with some hard liquor/ some vodka that'll jumpstart my heart quicker then a/ shock when I get shocked at the hospital by the Dr. when I'm not cooperating/ when I'm rocking the table while he's operating / you waited this long now stop debating cuz I'm back, I'm on the rag and ovulating/ I know that you got a job Ms. Cheney but your husbands heart problem's complicating / So the FCC wont let me be or let me be me so let me see/ they tried to shut me down on MTV but it feels so empty without me/ So come on and dip, bum on your lips fuck that, cum on your lips and some on your tits and get ready cuz this shit's about to get heavy/ I just settled all my lawsuits Fuck YOU DEBBIE_!
Chorus X2
Now this looks like a job for me so everybody just follow me/ cuz we need a little controversy, cuz it feels so empty without me
Verse 2
Little hellions kids feeling rebellious/ embarrassed, their parents still listen to Elvis/ they start feeling the prisoners helpless, 'til someone comes along on a mission and yells "bitch"/ A visionary, vision is scary, could start a revolution, pollutin the air waves a rebel/ so let me just revel an bask, in the fact that I got everyone kissing my ass/ and it's a disaster such a catastrophe for you to see so damn much of my ass you ask for me?/ Well I'm back (batman sound) fix your bent antennae tune it in and then I'm gonna/ enter in and up under your skin like a splinter/ The center of attention back for the winter/ I'm interesting, the best thing since wrestling/ Infesting in your kids ears and nesting/ Testing "Attention Please" feel the tension soon as someone mentions me/ here's my 10 cents my 2 cents is free/ A nuisance, who sent, you sent for me?
Chorus X2
Verse 3
A tisk-it a task-it, I'll go tit for tat with anybody who's talking this shit that shit. Chris Kirkpatrick you can get your ass kicked/ worse than them little Limp Bizkit bastards, and Moby/ you can get stomped by Obie, you 36 year old bald headed fag blow me/You don't know me, you're too old let go its over, nobody listens to techno/ Now lets go, give me the signal I'll be there with a whole list full of new insults/ I've been dope, suspenseful with a pencil ever since Prince turned himself into a symbol/ But sometimes the shit just seems, everybody only wants to discuss me/ So this must mean I'm disgusting, but its just me I'm just obscene/ Though I'm not the first king of controversy/ I am the worst thing since Elvis Presley, to do Black Music so selfishly/ and use it to get myself wealthy (Hey)/ there's a concept that works/ 20 million other white rappers emerge/ but no matter how many fish in the sea it'd be so empty without me |
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| 11:44am 21/07/2004 |
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Met a kid on a bridge last night contemplating freedom
He said I'm tired of this maddening life and I'm ready to go meet Jesus
I said he's a friend of mine met him just last night and it's all right yeah
It's all right yeah
I'll live this life until this life won't let me live here anymore
Then I will walk yes I will walk with patience through that open door
I have no fears angels follow me where ever I may go
I'll live this life until this life won't let me live here anymore |
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| 10:29pm 19/06/2004 |
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i had a breakdown today about the fact that THIS IS IT. my first weekend in NH signifies not seeing my friends, working all the time and being miserable. normally, i wouldnt be that upset about being all summer because when i came back home, you would all be there. but let's face it. this isn't beverly hills 90210 or saved by the bell. we arent all going to school together to be friends forever. we're all starting our own lives and I DONT WANT TO. i like my cushy life now. and my parents just dont get how much it sucks to be away all summer...because when i get back home this year everyone will have left for school. and that makes me cry. |
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| 10:49pm 11/04/2004 |
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For the record: I got an ashtray for Easter. |
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| 08:25pm 06/04/2004 |
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Do you ever think it could be more?
Or maybe less is more... |
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| 01:32am 03/04/2004 |
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I drive by the house that used to be the old condemned house on my street. They're remoldeling it so it's not like it used to be. Still gorgeuos - but just not the same. I loved the old house. People used to squat in it and my father was convinced they were making bombs. I never thought that. It was just this amazing old run down Victorian house. For years the town was deciding what to do with it. The historical people didn't want to tear it down because of it's historical background. However, the cost of restoring the house was money that no one had. The neighbors were upset about its rundown state and something had to be done. A compromise was made - the house would be rebuilt and a peice of the old house would be restored. They moved the old part to add it on to the new part. I watched it happen. I'm glad they kept that peice but devestated that no one would restore the whole thing. I always have known that the one reason I would come back to live in my later years was if I had the money to buy that house. I probably never will. I'm also told that other houses will be built on the property which will add to the ruin. I guess time goes on but if one day someone wants to marry me and live in that beautiful house - I will marry you. No questions asked. |
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| 06:10pm 02/04/2004 |
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i like the bruises, cuts and burns you leave on me ;) ....physical pain is easier to heal than emotional....i wish all men were like you |
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| 06:05pm 01/04/2004 |
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lying here with you...listening to the rain...smiling just to see the smile up your face...these are the moments i thank god that i'm alive....these are the moments i remember all my life, i have all i've waited for and i could not ask for more |
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| 11:20pm 29/03/2004 |
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no one has made me glow in awhile....but i was kind of glowing today... |
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sour_raspburry's journal